The A & A Wedding Liturgy
Welcome
Family and friends, we are gathered today to witness, to affirm, and to commit ourselves to the support of _______ and _______ as they enter into holy matrimony. The significance of this event is great; the promises of marriage have everlasting implications. But these sober thoughts are the same reasons we come together in joy and come together to celebrate.
The bride and groom would like to express thanks to all of you have come to share in this ceremony with them, and to those who would be here but are unable. All of you have contributed to the histories of one or both _______ and _______. While marriage changes each of them in some ways, they hope and request that their relationships with all of you will remain constant and continue to grow for many years to come.
Prayer of Invocation
Let us pray.
Father, we thank you for these two precious lives: _______ and _______, whom you have created, whom you have cared for through the loving support of their respective families, and whom you have brought together through love. We ask your blessing on this ceremony; may its significance endure with all in attendance, especially with _______ and _______. And we ask your blessing on this couple, that you will love them with everlasting love, provide for all their needs, that you will grant them long lives and an unshakeable love for each other in their marriage. Amen.
Marriage (Love)
We read in Ecclesiastes that, “though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not easily broken.” This image of the three-stranded cord has long served as a symbol for marriage. Today we will consider the three strands.
The first strand of marriage is the personal love found in the hearts of the marriage couple. There is something wonderful in the transformation that takes place in an couple when he and she begin to perceive the universe, not merely as individuals, but also as a newly discovered “WE”. It is the wonder of knowing and being known; it is shared happiness; it is the joy of intimacy.
When Adam first laid eyes on Eve, he exclaimed, “This one, at last, is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh.” Adam experienced euphoria. Euphoria in marriage is proper. It is to be embraced and cultivated through physical intimacy, through mutual service and through kindness. The perpetual pursuit of one’s spouse in these ways is essential to marriage.
We fall in love and, yet, we must also continue to mature in love. Paul wrote about mature love in his letter to the Corinthians: “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”
In the book of Luke we read, “No one lights a lamp and puts it in a place where it will be hidden, or under a bowl. Instead he puts it on a stand, so that those who come in may see the light.”
[The marriage couple moves to stand behind pre-lit candles]
You each hold a single flame, representing your individual spirits. By lighting this greater lamp you illustrate the love you have for one another and that you are decided to become one flesh, united in your spirits through marriage.
[The two light the lamp and blow out their individual candles. After a moment’s pause, they return to their original spots.]
Marriage (Commitment)
The second strand of marriage is commitment. Jesus reminded us that “A man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two but one. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no man separate.”
In a highly uncertain world it is crucial for us to be in relationships we can depend on. Just as Christ promises to never forsake his bride, the Church, those who marry proclaim, “I will die before I leave you.” The value of this commitment is revealed over and again, whether through reliable companionship, constant counsel, the joy of intimacy, or from facing together the challenges and difficulties of life.
Sometimes the strand of commitment must hold as the relationship in the marriage frays. Sometimes spouses are difficult to live with. But commitment is fundamentally about grace. It says, “I will forgive and I will labor to renew this relationship.” How is this possible? This grace is a gift from God, for even when we turned our back on him, he loved us so much that he gave up his life for our sakes. We cannot repay our debt to Him. But as recipients of great grace, we can understand the importance of also being givers of grace.
There is another commitment in marriage that, while implicit, is every bit as important. That commitment is to the potential fruit of the union of marriage: children. The married couple are to always love their children, care for them, and teach them all wisdom, that they, too, may prosper and live. For God created man and woman in his image. Together, then, the father and mother represent God to their children as they recreate life and sustain life in these children.
Please bring the rings.
[Rings are handed to the groom and bride]
The ring is a commonly recognized symbol of marriage. If you were obsessive enough, you could trace the outside of the ring…forever. That is a ring’s shape and nature. So it is a fitting symbol for the commitment of marriage. Marriage is to last as long as both parties remain alive.
[Bride’s first name], please repeat after me:
I, ________
give you this ring
as a symbol of my love.
[Put ring on finger]
As I place it on your finger,
I commit myself wholly to you.
I promise my faithfulness,
through difficulty and plenty,
as God and those assembled here
are my witnesses.
[Groom’s first name], please repeat after me:
I, ________
give you this ring
as a symbol of my love.
[Put ring on finger]
As I place it on your finger,
I commit myself wholly to you.
I promise my faithfulness,
through difficulties and plenty,
as God and those assembled here
are my witnesses.
Marriage (God’s Care)
The third strand of marriage is God himself. God created man and woman, as well as marriage. After God had created the earth and the man and the woman, he proclaimed that all of his creation “was very good.” God will not leave _______ and _______ to fend for themselves. No, he will hear their prayers, he will provide for their needs, He will grant understanding, and will add peace and love to their hearts. The prophet Zephaniah spoke these words: “The Lord your God is with you; he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you in his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.”
God’s grace comes in many forms. His hands and feet on this earth are usually the people he sends. Today, those he has sent are all of you assembled. You have come as witnesses to this wedding, and you have come as advocates for the bride and groom. There are times when _______ and _______ will need your support, whether through counsel, or prayer, or child care, or through some other practical means. As friends and family, the care of this couple is part of your purpose and calling.
I ask you in the congregation to consider committing to the following statement: I stand witness to the love, the commitment, and to the marriage of _______ and _______. It is with joy that I commit to pray for and support this precious young couple to the best of my ability.
If you can commit to this statement say, “I will”.
Congregation: I will
Let us pray. Father, we thank you for your tender, pursuing love. We thank you that, by your Spirit, we are able to love one another. Grant faithfulness in this marriage, and diligent support for _______ and _______ from all who have assembled here, as well as from those who would be here but are unable.
Vows
Now let us proceed to the final vows.
[Bride’s name], please repeat after me:
_______, I promise to love and honor you,
to walk with you through joy and sorrow.
I vow to treasure in you
all that is unique and beautiful,
and to patiently bear with your weaknesses.
You have been my friend;
today I take you to be my husband.
I join my life to yours.
[Groom’s name], please repeat after me:
_______, I promise to love and honor you,
to walk with you through joy and sorrow.
I vow to treasure in you
all that is unique and beautiful,
and to patiently bear with your weaknesses.
You have been my friend;
today I take you to be my wife.
I join my life to yours.
Before God and in the presence of this company, by genuine consent and promise of commitment, and through the exchange of rings, _______ and _______ have given themselves to one another in marriage. May all honor and support them in their love and resolve. In the name of the loving God, Creator of the universe, we now recognize these precious ones to be husband and wife.
________, you may kiss your bride. [Kiss]
Let us pronounce a blessing on this union:
Almighty and gentle Father,
we call on you to smile on _______ and _______ this day.
We ask that you hold them in your strong hand forevermore.
May they enjoy long life together;
May they always fill each other with joy;
May they always pursue one another in love.
Grant them peace and prosperity in this life and in the next.
Amen
Ladies and gentlemen, it is our glad privilege to present for the very first time: Mr. and Mrs. _______ _______!
Recessional
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